Random Peeks at My Life (or, How Bored Are You Right Now?)


Last night, as I lay in bed, comforter up to my chin, cat curled at my feet, and sugarplums beginning to dance in my head, Mike suddenly spoke in the darkness:

"I feel bad that Lenny made it big and Squiggy didn't."

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Early this morning I dreamt that I fell down (big surprise there) on a hill covered with wreaths. In my dream I turned to my daughter, and in my best Geico gecko voice, said, "I've fallen on ma boom, and ma scahf is caught on a Christmas Cactus wreaf." (The reason I remember this is that I woke up and recited it over and over so I could tell Flutterbug in the morning. Only thing is, I can't do a Geico gecko voice in real life. How disappointing.)

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Mike washed a sinkful of dishes this morning before I even made it downstairs. He's the man.

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There's a talking Ann Coulter doll in the backseat of my car. How many people can say that?

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Mike taught Flutterbug how to drive a stick-shift. He certainly was optimistic - brought a full cup of coffee into the car with him.

Her dad had her drive around the neighborhood for about a half hour, and then he followed her the five miles to church.

She did fine until she got to one intersection near the church where she stalled.

Then she peeled out.

Then she got to the stop sign opposite the church and a guy was sauntering across the street staring at her. When he finally made it across, she tried to go, but stalled.

Then stalled again.

And then again.

The guy started gesturing and yelling instructions to her in a most unhelpful way and finally, with the help of a surge of anger and irritation, she made it into the churchyard.

And then she burst into tears.

That's my girl!

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I've been crafting...with feathers, glass, wood, Sharpies, and silver. Curious?

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I made meatballs tonight. See, the doctor says my blood pressure is creeping up, so I figure that's a good excuse to cook from scratch. Do you know how much sodium is in anything premade? I was shocked to find that my favorite lunch, Philly Cheese Lean Pockets, has a whopping 640 thingies of sodium. And, you know how it is, some days require TWO pockets. So...I've stopped buying those salt-licks. Had frosting for lunch yesterday, with gum for dessert. (I'm a baby-step kind of person.)

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We looked at an abandoned assisted-living home as a potential spot for Victory Home. Please pray! It's a terrific and spacious property.

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A couple of Victory Home guys are working on ridding our attic of critters. Good luck to them. There's a veritable village of pigeons, squirrels, and what sounds like a possible elephant stomping around up there. I've got enough of a menagerie here on the main floors: Buddy, who licked fiberglass yesterday, and Kiki, who prefers frozen vegetables. Is there such a thing as a pet who enjoys pet food?

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Yawwwwn; I need to cozy up to the woodstove for a few minutes and then toddle off to bed. Got a busy, wacky weekend coming up, and a trip to South Carolina next week. I need a good dream-free, husband-spouting-nutty-comments-free beauty sleep (what are the odds?). Night-night.

5 comments:

modemom said...

I've got to stop reading your "Random Peeks..." postings just before I go to bed. They're too funny! I am now wide awake from laughing so hard and will need to spend a couple hours playing Free Cell to get myself sleepy enough to crawl in.

See ya soon!

Lainie said...

I DO LOVE READING YOUR BLOG. WHAT A TALENTED WRITER YOU ARE AND WHAT A FUN FAMILY YOU HAVE.

Melanie (aka Timber) said...

Thank you, Auntie-and-Her-Sis; when life is this wacky, one doesn't need a whole lot of writing talent. In fact, if only someone would follow us around with a camera, it'd make a great reality show (especially compared to some) and I wouldn't have to take the trouble to type it up. Today's episode could have included three ladies in a tiny Honda jerking and stalling our way down the road as Flutterbug drove us home from church (it was a sight to behold, and such fun)!

Brenda Christmas said...

That was definitely random, and a hoot to boot! hehehe

K once tried to teach me to drive a stick shift. I then attempted to drive myself to work. Instead, I crashed into and demolished a bush in front of our house. Missed the house itself, thank goodness, but scared the wadding out of me. Stormed in the house and ordered K to drive me to work! :-O I have never touched a stick shift again!

"I've fallen on me boom." LOL

Melanie (aka Timber) said...

Too funny, Brenda! At least the bush was yours and not a nasty neighbor's!